by Kerri MacFarlane | Feb 15, 2026 | Alcohol Free, Blog, Healing, Miscarriage, Moms in Recovery, Womens health
Today’s blog entry is from Hali Morehouse. Hali is a member of Café RE.
Where Heartbreak Meets Redemption: A Story of Miscarriage, Faith, and Sobriety
By: Hali Morehouse
There I am—sitting in the brown chair, awaiting the doctor’s arrival, unaware that this moment would mark the beginning of a journey through miscarriage and sobriety. From the outside, one might see the image of a young woman who appears calm, confident, healthy, and mentally stable—never realizing that the upcoming conversation is about to crack her soul wide open and leave her heart broken, crumbled, and lost in the wilderness of the unknown.
I could see it in the doctor’s eyes—in her posture, her tone of voice, and in the way she carried the information throughout our conversation. Contained within the questions, concerns, and curiosity she expressed, the word miscarriage was the boulder that became the riverblock in my never-ending flow of life.
As that ten-letter word found its place inside my ears, the beats within my chest began to pound. Louder and louder—like a drum set being played inside a closed room. For a brief moment, my world began to spin. I could feel sweat forming in my palms as I nervously played with the rings on my fingers.
There it goes.
No pause. Only raw, deep, unfiltered tears. The internal dam burst wide open—broken into the smallest particles of rubble. Eyes red. Mildly bloodshot. My heart still pounding.
The Waiting, the Body, and Miscarriage and Sobriety
Gathering my personal items with all the strength I could muster, I walked down two flights of stairs to my next destination—the laboratory for a blood test. After placing my belongings in their designated spots, I sat once again in a thick, brown chair.
The internal waterfall, deep in the crevice of my soul, cried out to be released. It took every ounce of energy to pull back—to contain what felt like an ever-lasting flow—to place that dreadful STOP sign in front of my heart.
For the first time I can remember, my veins were visible—for the world to see, or in this case, for the nurses to see. A storm building. Bubbling violently.
Time slowed once that small yet powerful needle entered my arm. I tried—oh, how I tried—to engage in active conversation. But uncertainty filled the space. The unknown lingered. My vision and thoughts grew cloudy, as if I had entered a temporary black cloud.
Then, just as quickly, the needle was removed. A Band-Aid placed over the spot where my world shifted.
When Loss Becomes Real
That dreadful period—the waiting game from hell—where your heart pounds harder and harder, like sitting in the front row of a rock concert. External vibrations paired with internal panic, enough to bring a person to their knees. Unable to breathe. Unable to see clearly.
Oh, the dread. The devastating, anxiety-inducing dread.
My insides twisted into an absolute knot. I felt nauseous, though vomiting never came. As moments passed, my self-awareness heightened.
After the appointment, my fiancé and I headed home. Suddenly, my body felt different. A pinching—almost poking—sensation below my abdomen, deep within my pelvic region. Not painful, just noticeable. Stirring.
Once home, I went to the restroom.
And then it happened.
Blood—about the size of a small lemon—had left my body.
In that instant, my physical body entered a different realm. Where firmness and fullness had existed only moments before, there was now softness. Emptiness. Pure emptiness.
The Confirmation
The emptiness was indescribable.
Then—ding.
A notification from MyChart appeared on my phone. I opened the app and saw that my test results had arrived. Dread and panic returned instantly.
Based on my symptoms and the bleeding, a super-early miscarriage had either taken place or was coming to an end. The early signs of pregnancy I once felt had disappeared.
It was like watching a magician pull a rabbit from a hat—except there was no applause. No fascination. No joy.
Only fog.
My mind clouded with confusion, frustration, and deep sadness.
Faith in the Midst of Grief
In my 33 years of lived experience, I’ve learned there is no way to prepare for the tragedies, tribulations, trials, devastation, and loss that exist in this lifetime—the suffering that comes with living on this side of Heaven.
I am not promised an easy life.
But I am promised that I am never alone.
Through the darkest valleys, the highest mountaintops, the deepest oceans, and the strongest storms—I have remained, and will continue to remain, anchored to the foundation of my faith.
Miscarriage and Sobriety Are Not a Straight Line
Two days have passed since receiving the heartbreaking news of our miscarriage. In recovery, it is often said that miscarriage and sobriety are both non-linear journeys—and this truth deserves the highest regard.
Whether navigating recovery, returning to faith, or searching for light while walking through loss, a straight and narrow line is nowhere to be found. Expecting linearity to appear like a bright, flashing sign only creates roadblocks—or gravel roads—toward self-detriment.
Healing Through Community
One truth remains: when navigating miscarriage and sobriety, we cannot walk this path alone.
We were not created to journey in isolation. We are meant to embrace the gift—the blessing—the sacred gem of community.
The opposite of addiction is connection.
That connection arrived in my life through a global tribe: Café RE. As a fellow warrior within this community, I have laid my soul bare. I have shared from the darkest places of my heart. I have exposed my vulnerability completely—and in return, I have received unconditional love, compassion, grace, empathy, encouragement, and support from others who have faced their own battlefields and demons.
Choosing Belonging Over Fitting In
When we choose to stop trying to fit in with the outside world and instead discover the beauty of belonging, the right people will find us.
All we must do is remain still.
Honest.
Transparent.
Open-minded.
Willing to be vulnerable.
This is the magic of community.
“Sharing your story isn’t just a nice idea. It’s a neural intervention.”
Touch the Sky — Hillsong UNITED
by Kerri MacFarlane | Jan 15, 2026 | Alcohol Free, Alcohol Relapse, Big Alcohol, Blog, Early Sobriety, Science and alcohol
The Numbers Don’t Lie: Only 54 Percent of Adults Drink Alcohol
Quitting alcohol can feel isolating, like you’ll be the only one not drinking. But here’s the truth: only 54 percent of adults drink alcohol, according to a new Gallup poll. That’s the lowest number in nearly 90 years, and it proves you’re not as alone as you might think.
A recent Gallup poll reported by CBS News found that only 54 percent of adults drink alcohol — a record low in nearly 90 years of polling.
In other words, almost half of Americans don’t drink at all.
Why Fewer Americans Are Drinking
This shift didn’t happen overnight. The poll highlights two major drivers:
- Health Risks Are Impossible to Ignore. In 2015, only 28% of Americans believed moderate alcohol use was harmful. By 2025, that number had nearly doubled to 53%. Science has caught up with culture, and the messaging is clear: alcohol is a carcinogen, a risk factor for over 100,000 cancer cases annually in the U.S., and a contributor to around 20,000 cancer deaths each year.
- Generational Change. Younger Americans are leading the way in questioning alcohol’s role in their lives. Social norms are shifting, and the alcohol industry is feeling the pressure.
Podcaster and speaker Scott Galloway recently told AB InBev’s board, bluntly:
“You’re fcked—and you’re double fcked.”
People are drinking less overall, and younger generations—the industry’s “future customers”—are opting out entirely.
The Numbers Don’t Lie: Only 54 Percent of Adults Drink Alcohol
Some of the most telling stats from the Gallup report include:
When Recovery Elevator launched more than ten years ago, over 60% of Americans reported drinking. That number has steadily declined, reflecting a real and measurable cultural shift.
The Numbers Don’t Lie: Only 54 Percent of Adults Drink Alcohol
This is more than just a poll. It’s proof that the cultural tide is turning.
For years, communities like Recovery Elevator have been sharing a simple truth: alcohol is not the harmless social lubricant we’ve been sold. It’s toxic. It takes lives. And choosing not to drink isn’t weird—it’s wise.
The more mainstream outlets cover this, the more people start to question their relationship with alcohol. What used to be “radical” is becoming normal. And if you’re sober, sober-curious, or just taking a break, you’re not swimming against the current anymore. You’re part of a growing wave.
You’re Not Alone: Nearly Half of Americans Don’t Drink Alcohol
If you’ve ever told yourself, “I’ll be the only one not drinking,” remember this: only 54 percent of adults drink alcohol — which means nearly half of Americans are right there with you.
This isn’t fringe. This isn’t rare. It’s becoming the norm.
- I don’t drink.
- Odette doesn’t drink.
- And 46% of Americans don’t drink either.
The myth of “everyone drinks” has officially been dismantled.
Final Thoughts: What the Decline in Alcohol Use Means for Sobriety
Ten years ago, none of us could have predicted this. But here we are: fewer Americans are drinking, the science is loud and clear, and the alcohol-free movement is gaining momentum.
If you’re on this path, know that you’re not alone. Millions of people are making the same choice, and together, we’re reshaping culture.
The question isn’t “Why don’t you drink?” anymore. It’s “Why would you?”
👉 Join the Movement: Thinking about changing your relationship with alcohol? Café RE is a private, supportive community for anyone who wants to ditch the booze and live a healthier, more connected life.
by RE Helper | Dec 15, 2025 | Alcohol Free, Blog, Helpful Tips, Uncategorized
Today’s blog entry is from Sher Bailey. Sher is a member of Café RE.
It’s Never Too Late to Quit Drinking: Better Late Than Never
By: Sher Bailey
Now seven months sober, I ask the question: How did I quit drinking? After trying so many things for so many years, what finally worked? I used to wonder if it was too late for me, but I’ve learned it’s never too late to quit drinking. While I’m not sure of the answer, I am hoping others on the sobriety journey can be helped by my suggestions. I am surprised at how many things I tried.
Listening to podcasts
Starting in 2015, I listened to thousands of podcasts from countless sources. No surprise that Paul’s Recovery Elevator was one of my first and still my favorite. A few years later, I started listening to Rachel Hart’s Take a Break from Drinking and more recently Deb Master’s Alcohol Tipping Point. I am in the habit of listening to podcasts while walking/jogging every day. Some times, I keep my Air Pods in while I run errands or make dinner.
Reading quit lit
I love to read, and I focused on my favorite subject: sobriety. I read Paul’s Alcohol is Sh!t, Holly Whitaker’s Quit Like a Woman, Byron Katie’s The Truth Behind Addiction and Laura McKowen’s We are the Luckiest and Push Off From Here. (I highly recommend the audio versions of both of Laura’s books Her story is full of pain and vulnerability, and her voice is too.) You name it, I read it. Seriously.
Therapy
For years, every time I walked in to a physician or therapist office the first words out of my mouth were “I drink every day and often too much.” I usually left with only the suggestion that I cut back or quit, but no real ideas on how. I tried two therapists who said they would use Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) to address childhood trauma and the resulting depression and anxiety. I hoped by dealing with the underlying causes, my urge to drink would subside. But rather than experimenting with EMDR, I ended up doing talk therapy, a continuation of what I’d done off and on for decades.
Meditation/Hypnosis
Wise Monkey Way and Hypnozio are apps that talk you through meditations and hypnoses to curb the urge to drink. I listened to the Hypnozio recordings every day upon awakening for several months. But there was no immediate result. In addition to reading Holly Whitaker’s Quit Like a Woman, I listened to her 30 Days to a New Relationship with Alcohol on Audible. In this, Holly provides a 5-minute message or mantra that I listened to each morning and then, for the remainder of the day, thought about or meditated on. The messages include “I am allowed to say no” and “I allow myself to be surprised.” My very favorite of the series: “A part of me knows how to do this.”
My family
I can’t leave out the fact that in the past several years, my two adult sons and my husband got sober. At first their sobriety made me dig in with my drinking — just because they were now sober, didn’t mean I had to be.
Their sobriety planted seeds in me, even when I didn’t realize it. It reminded me that it’s never too late to quit drinking.
When you least expect it
And then one day, just before my 71st birthday (that’s right, 71), I realized I was no longer interested in drinking. That moment taught me it’s never too late to quit drinking. It was a Sunday, and the night before I’d had two or three vodka/sodas, which was a minimum for me. But when I went to bed, I experienced the spins and only avoided getting sick by going to sleep. I’ve never looked back. My first thought every morning is: I am grateful. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Other than when I was pregnant or taking a break for a few weeks here and there, I drank daily for 50 years. I had begun to feel that it was too late for me to quit. Besides, almost everyone I’d met or read were much, much younger than me. If that’s you, I’m happy that you will quit drinking with so much of your life ahead of you.
Everything counts
So what worked? I think it was everything. Convinced that hypnosis or therapy or all the other activities weren’t helping, I backed off even trying. And lo and behold, the cycle stopped.
I can’t say every day is easy but most are. When I think about having a drink, I play the tape forward, as so many people have suggested, and realize I don’t want to feel bad the next day because I so much enjoy waking up earlier, being fully-rested and ready for the day. Now I’d like to help others, no matter how young or old, enjoy sobriety too.
As in life, nothing you are doing or have done is a waste. Every podcast you hear, every word you read, every day you focus on drinking less or not at all holds meaning. It truly is never too late to quit drinking.
Because, after all, part of you knows how to do this.
by Kerri MacFarlane | Nov 15, 2025 | Alcohol Free, Blog, Early Sobriety
Better Than Before Sobriety: The Unexpected Gift
When people think about healing from disease, the hope is usually to return to a pre-illness state — to go back to “normal.”
But in recovery, something different can happen. As Steve-O (yes, that Steve-O from Jackass) recently shared, sobriety has the power to make us better than before sobriety, not just restored to who we were. It’s about moving forward into a version of yourself you may never have known was possible.
Steve-O, who has been sober since March 10, 2008, put words to something many of us in recovery know but struggle to explain: sobriety isn’t about going back. It’s about moving forward into a version of yourself you may never have known was possible.
Addiction as a Wake-Up Call to Live Differently
This might sound wild, but stick with me: addiction itself might be a biological mechanism designed to wake us up.
In Paul’s upcoming book Dolce Vita, he argues that addiction can push us into living differently — with radical honesty, authenticity, and a willingness to serve others. If 8 billion humans lived with those qualities, imagine how different the world would be.
Sobriety, then, is not just recovery. It’s transformation. It’s an invitation to live closer to the way humans were meant to live: in connection, not isolation.
Sobriety and the Power of Potential
The key word here is potential.
- Quitting drinking is a massive step, but stopping alcohol alone doesn’t automatically unlock healing.
- Without addressing the deeper “why” — the separation, the loneliness, the pain beneath the drinking — one can end up a dry drunk.
- True recovery means leaning into growth, connection, and honesty. That’s where the potential lies.
Sobriety offers not just a return to health, but a chance to become a better version of yourself than you were before the drinking ever started.
Why Connection Is Central to Recovery
Addiction thrives in isolation. Sobriety thrives in connection.
We live in a time where loneliness is at historic highs. But the very process of recovery calls us back into community. Every share in a meeting, every conversation with a sponsor, every moment of vulnerability — these are bricks laid on the path toward something far richer than alcohol ever offered.
If you’re listening to a sobriety podcast, reading blogs like this, or engaging in recovery spaces, you’re already doing the work. You’re not a dry drunk. You’re investing in the version of yourself that’s better than before.
Rediscovering Life Through Sobriety
Recovery can feel like circling back to a childlike state — curious, open, honest. That’s not regression; that’s rediscovery.
On this journey, don’t forget to stop and smell the roses. Sobriety isn’t just about staying away from alcohol. It’s about experiencing life with presence, gratitude, and joy.
Final Thoughts: Why Sobriety Is Better Than Before
Steve-O’s words capture something profound: sobriety isn’t about reclaiming your old self. It’s about discovering your true self.
And that true self? It’s better than before.
👉 Ready to explore your own potential? Join us at Café RE, a private, supportive community for people ready to live alcohol-free and create lives filled with connection, honesty, and purpose.
by Kerri MacFarlane | Oct 15, 2025 | Alcohol Free, Blog, Helpful Tips, The first Year
Spiritual healing after quitting alcohol can be subtle, surprising, and deeply meaningful. It’s also the focus of Part 3 in our three-month series on the healing that takes place in your first year alcohol-free.
In Part 1 we explored physical healing, and in Part 2 we covered mental healing. Now, we’re shifting to something less tangible but equally powerful—your connection to self, others, and the world around you.
Let’s dig in.
🌱 Spiritual Healing After Quitting Alcohol: What May Happen in Week One
- For many, nothing profound happens immediately. That’s normal.
- But you might have had a moment before your last drink when time seemed to pause—a flicker of presence that let you really see where alcohol was taking you.
- That moment of clarity, however fleeting, may have been the start.
🍃 First Month of Spiritual Healing After Quitting Alcohol
- Your intuition might quietly peek out and ask, “Is it safe to return yet?”
- You may feel a pull toward nature—a walk in the woods, leaning on a tree, or just sitting still under the sky.
- You might experience a few moments of pure gratitude—not for things, but for being.
- Even something simple, like watching a bird or a breeze in the trees, might hold your attention longer than usual.
🌌 Spiritual Growth and Awareness in Months 1–6 Alcohol-Free
- Synchronicities start happening—those “too weird to be coincidence” moments.
- You begin to feel the emotions of others more deeply, maybe even animals or the earth itself.
- You start listening to your intuition and trusting it.
- Your connection to something greater than yourself—something that doesn’t come in a bottle—starts to take root.
- Authentic wisdom bubbles up. Sometimes you surprise yourself with what you say (and yes, you sound a bit like a fortune cookie).
- You begin to sense the universe has a sense of humor—and you’re in on the joke.
✨ Spiritual Healing in Year One of Sobriety: A New Connection to Life
- You start to notice the spaces between life’s events, not just the events themselves.
- You realize this journey isn’t about becoming someone new—it’s about unbecoming what was never really you.
- Books like The Power of Now, The Dao, or The Artist’s Way might find their way into your life—often “accidentally.”
- You may pause before killing a spider, recognizing you’re both part of something shared.
- Decisions shift—you’re guided more by intuition than logic.
- Material things matter less. Moments matter more.
- You find yourself standing in awe of a canyon, a sunset, or a mountain—and feeling it all in a way you never used to.
- You begin seeking wisdom from ancestors, indigenous cultures, spiritual texts—things you once dismissed.
- You may start meditating or exploring your inner self.
- You discover flow states—where time disappears, and presence takes over.
🌊 Long-Term Spiritual Healing and Transformation in Sobriety
- You begin helping others heal, not by fixing, but by simply walking alongside them.
- You value silence and listening as much as speaking.
- Gratitude becomes your default mode—less about what’s missing, more about what already is.
- Creativity returns: music, poetry, painting, dancing—even spontaneous singing while cooking. (The Artist’s Way is a great guide here.)
- The dream world and waking world start to dance—you dream of an owl, then see one the next day.
- Your inner child reawakens—you feel playful, curious, light again.
- You feel less like a wave, more like the ocean. Life moves around you, but it no longer knocks you down.
- You stop labeling life events as “good” or “bad”—they just are, and somehow, they all fit.
- You begin to trust that everything is unfolding exactly as it should.
- And eventually, you realize:
What you’ve been searching for all along has been inside you the whole time.
🌟 The Healing Never Stops
So here we are—three parts, three layers of healing: physical, mental, and spiritual. This list? It’s just the beginning.
Sobriety doesn’t just take something away—it gives you back a connection you didn’t know you were missing. The healing deepens, the awareness expands, and the sense of peace grows.
Whether you’re a week in or years down the road—keep going. You’re not becoming someone new. You’re just remembering who you were all along.
📖 Missed a part? Catch up here:
👉 Part 1: Physical Healing After Quitting Alcohol
👉 Part 2: Mental Healing After Quitting Alcohol
#SpiritualHealingAfterQuittingAlcohol #AlcoholFreeLiving #SobrietyJourney #YearOneAF #EmotionalRecovery #SpiritualGrowth #SoberCurious #HealingInSobriety #RecoveryElevator #ThisIsAF #ConnectionIsTheOppositeOfAddiction
by Kerri MacFarlane | Sep 15, 2025 | Alcohol Free, Early Sobriety, The first Year
Mental healing after quitting alcohol begins almost immediately—but it doesn’t always look the way we expect it to. Welcome to Part 2 of our three-part series on what happens in your first year alcohol-free. In this installment, we’re exploring the psychological and emotional recovery that takes place when you remove alcohol from your life.
In Part 1, we covered physical healing. Next month, we’ll wrap up with spiritual healing (don’t worry—it’s not about religion).
🧠 Mental Healing After Quitting Alcohol: What Happens in the First Week
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The first 24–72 hours? Don’t expect much mentally. Maybe a headache.
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Brain fog begins to lift by the end of the week (it doesn’t clear, just starts lifting).
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Suppressed emotions start showing up—this is a good thing. Let them come.
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Slight improvements in focus.
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Mood swings might hit hard. You may alternate between “I’m a radiant being of pure light” and “I’m the saddest human ever created” approximately every 23 minutes.
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Memory recall starts improving.
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Anxiety spikes, then begins to settle.
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Depressive symptoms lighten slightly. The internal weather shifts from “apocalyptic storm” to “light drizzle with a chance of sun.”
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Your self-image starts to shift. Shame softens, guilt fades.
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A quiet sense of morale reappears. Your inner cheerleader shows up to practice again—tentatively, but there.
💡Cognitive Changes in Sobriety: Mental Healing in the First Month
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Thoughts become clearer. Concentration improves. The mental fog now resembles a mist.
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Dopamine starts showing up for things like sunsets, puppy videos, and hugs—not just alcohol.
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Moods stabilize a bit. Emotional storms downgrade from hurricanes to unpredictable showers.
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The amygdala (fear center) calms down without the fuel of alcohol.
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Stress is managed more skillfully. You’ve already navigated a few sober challenges.
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Mental stamina improves—reading a whole book chapter or watching a full movie without checking your phone 17 times? Big win.
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You notice tiny sparks of joy in small things.
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Decisions start aligning with your values. Fewer time-travel regrets.
🔁 Psychological Recovery After Quitting Alcohol: Months 2–6
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Emotional regulation improves. You now respond instead of react—most of the time.
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You start seeing thoughts as thoughts, not truths. “I’m a failure” becomes “I had a thought that I’m a failure.” Huge shift.
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You start collecting emotional data—what triggered you, what helped, and what didn’t.
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Dopamine rewiring continues. Activities like hiking, reading, or deep convos become satisfying.
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Oxytocin joins the party—you might prefer puppy snuggles over pints.
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Melatonin returns to baseline. Sleep becomes a friend again.
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Emotions feel richer and more layered—life is now in emotional HD.
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Long-term memory returns. Gaps in memory shrink.
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Serotonin production stabilizes. Your brain is making its own joy—no booze required.
🎉 Mental Health After Stopping Drinking: What Year One Looks Like
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Significant brain tissue repair. The brain’s “skeleton crew” has been replaced by a full team with blueprints and fresh paint.
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Forgiveness becomes real—especially self-forgiveness.
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Dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and endorphin systems are functioning as intended. No artificial boosters needed.
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Shame and guilt dramatically reduce. You know you’re doing what’s right for your body, brain, and soul.
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You can be alone with your thoughts without needing to numb out, scroll endlessly, or eat three dozen cookies.
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Mental clarity returns—along with the belief that you can do hard things. (Maybe not calculus, but let’s keep expectations realistic.)
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Anxiety is mostly gone. What remains is manageable and often just excitement in disguise.
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Sadness and depression still happen—but they pass on their own, no longer swallowing you whole.
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You can problem-solve. IKEA furniture? Bring it on.
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Confidence and self-worth return. You are no longer on a path of destruction—you’re building something beautiful.
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Emotions become allies. You don’t run from them—you listen to them.
🚀 Mental Healing After Alcohol: Why It Only Gets Better From Here
This is just a short list of what’s possible in your first year alcohol-free. Mental healing continues far beyond 12 months. The longer you stay the course, the more peace, clarity, and confidence you build.
Maybe the biggest shift of all?
How you feel about yourself.
Because you’re not just quitting alcohol.
You’re choosing to live. Fully.
📖 Missed part 1? Check out the Physical Healing post here.
🧘 Stay tuned for next month: Spiritual Healing (No Religion Required).
#AlcoholFreeLife #MentalHealthRecovery #SobrietyTools #RecoveryElevator #WeDoRecover #ThisIsAF #SoberNotBoring #EmotionalGrowth #AFJourney
