Tom, with a sobriety date of June 6, 2018, shares his story.
Events – I am excited about the upcoming events for Recovery Elevator. As already mentioned on the podcast we have Nashville on Saturday, February 23rd. We also have the Bozeman Retreat from Aug 14-18th. The Bozeman Retreat was a huge hit in 2017 and it is back on the calendar for this year.
Guys, what I am particularly excited about these days is sober travel. We are putting together the sober travel itineraries and the next one we are doing is an Asia trip in late January 2020. This will be a 12 day trip, flying into Bangkok, Thailand and then making our way over to Siem Reap, Cambodia where we will make our departure. Experiencing the culture, service work, and recovery workshops will all be a part of this trip.
You can find more information about all these events at recoveryelevator.com/events.
We’ve all heard of FOMO, or the Fear Of Missing Out. Today I want to talk to you about JOMO – the Joy Of Missing Out. The Joy Of Missing Out is the emotionally intelligent antidote to FOMO, and is essentially about being present and content where you are at this moment in life. Instead of constantly trying to keep up with the Jones’, JOMO allows us to be who we are in the present moment, which is the secret to finding happiness.
At the end of the episode I have a bunch of ”You might be an alcoholic if…” lines. Listeners I would love to hear your own “You might be an alcoholic if” lines. Email them to email@example.com and put YMBAAI in the subject line.
[6:55] Paul Introduces Tom.
Tom, who considered himself a high-functioning alcoholic, is 50 years old, lives in Seattle, Washington, and has a sobriety date of 6/4/18. He is married, has two children, and a pug named Violet. He works in the high tech field.
[10:30] Give us a little background about your drinking.
He had his first drink when he was 14, and although he didn’t really like it his friends were doing it, so he kept doing it. Drank a lot in high school, it was almost like a sport. The first 10-15 years he feels he was a regular drinker, that he could take it, or leave it. He began binge drinking in college. The last 20 years he was drinking every day, but didn’t think he had a problem.
[16:50] When did you know that something was not right with your drinking?
That started about 2 years ago when he started getting numbness in his fingers, enough times that he went to the doctor about it. The doctor asked him what his drinking was like. About a year ago he had a major stressor in his life and the way he dealt with it was by drinking. Up until that point he always thought he drank for relaxation.
[24:30] Walk us through your early part of sobriety.
Tom says the first 4-5 were hard and talked about the drinking dreams he had. He changed his whole routine and became what he called a “sobriety savage”. He attends AA at least once a week but is not sure it is something he wants to continue to do for the rest of his life.
[35:25] What have you learned most about yourself in these past 7 months?
That you are never too far gone.
[38:50] Rapid Fire Round
- What was your worst memory from drinking?
When he went on a church camping trip and he got so drunk that he packed up the family early and snuck away the next morning.
- Did you ever have an “oh-shit” moment?
He had never told anyone this; about a year ago he went out driving at 3:00 AM and was driving in a manner that he was basically putting his life in God’s hands. He spun out, the car stopped, and he finally came to his senses and balled like a baby.
- What’s your plan in sobriety moving forward?
Keep it simple. Live in the moment. Continue going to AA. Really connect with people.
- What’s the best advice you’ve ever received (on sobriety)?
His son telling him to go to AA.
- What parting piece of advice can you give to listeners?
Do what you need to do to keep yourself sober and keep yourself safe. You don’t need to know everything at that moment.
- You might be an alcoholic if…
You can’t recall which Netflix shows you have binged, or plan to binge, even as you are possibly watching them.
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Connect with Cafe RE– Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free
Sober Selfies! – Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to firstname.lastname@example.org