RE 597: Moving On

by Kris Oyen | Jul 27, 2026 | Podcast

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Today we have Shane. He is 45 years old, lives in Northern California, and he took his last drink on September 12^th, 2013.

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[01:08] Thoughts from Paul:

Paul shares that he is having trouble moving on after his loss of Ben. There is still a pile of poop in his yard that he is not going to pick up. He reflects that over time; he knows it will eventually disappear as life moves on and so will he eventually.

Moving on from alcohol is hard too. Yes, there were fun times, great memories, but it turned and it’s no longer serving us. As a community, we are all moving on.

As Odette said in episode 282 – you can miss drinking even though you don’t want to drink anymore. Don’t sweep the pain of losing alcohol under a rug, it needs to be grieved as it is the loss of a major life companion. But…we are moving on. And you are invited to join us.

[04:17] Paul introduces Shane:

Shane is from Northern California, is married and they have two children. He works full time in podcasting and communications, and for fun he enjoys playing golf, chess and fitness.

Shane says he grew up in an alcoholic household, and his parents were very young when they had him. Growing up he had a lot of resentments and anger towards his parents which he feels led him down the path to use alcohol and other drugs to escape.

After a baseball injury, Shane started playing in bands with aspirations of making it in the music business. Along with this came a lot of partying, drugs and alcohol which ended up being a big part of his twenties. In the back of his mind he knew he didn’t want to live that way, but he ignored it.

Once they had their daughter, Shane began to realize that he was becoming everything that he never wanted to be. The last three years of his drinking progressed so quickly, Shane says, and drinking was such a normalized part of life.

The day of his last drink found Shane talking to his wife and letting her know that he needed help to quit drinking. He says the weight lifted off of his shoulders but then he instantly was concerned about the fact that there was no turning back.

With the help of his wife and their close friend who got sober, Shane went to inpatient rehab and says it saved his life. When he returned to work, he found himself commuting a lot and a friend introduced him to podcasts. Recognizing that there weren’t a lot of sobriety podcasts, Shane decided to start his own.

The point of creating the podcast for Shane was to give a space where people could openly share. Shane encourages anyone that may think they have an issue with alcohol to find someone they trust and just open up about it. He believes that conversation creates connection and addiction is the opposite of connection.

Shane shares that the biggest gift that sobriety has given him is presence and being conscious. It has given him the ability to grow into his authentic self.

Shane’s parting piece of guidance: Go for it. Jump in. Don’t wait. You’re not alone.

You can find Shane and all of the offerings he has on his website: That Sober Guy.

Recovery Elevator

We took the elevator down.

We got to take the stairs back up.

We can do this.

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RE 591: Open Up To Life

by Kris Oyen | Jun 15, 2026 | Podcast

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Today we have Meg. She is 36 years old, lives in Houston, TX and she took her last drink on October 11^th, 2020.

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If you’re wondering what you can expect in your first seven days alcohol free, check out our new FREE 7-day guide.

[02:26] Thoughts from Paul:

You’ve heard the opposite of addiction is connection. Alcohol wants you turning away from people into a more isolated life. Paul encourages us to find small moments in the day when you can open up towards life and shares some examples of how we can engage with other people and nature throughout our lives.

[07:21] Paul introduces Meg:

Meg is 36 years old and lives in Houston, TX with her two cats Fred and George. She works as an HR coordinator for Meow Wolf and for fun, Meg enjoys walking, puzzling and writing.

Meg didn’t have her first drink until she was 18 years old but instantly knew it was a special elixir that was going to allow her to be more social and comfortable. Throughout college, Meg says she always drank, often to excess with the purpose of getting drunk. She didn’t recognize it as a problem at that point and just continued to spend time with friends who drank like her.

Meg got two DUIs when she was in her early 20s. She developed relationships where drinking was part of how they would relate to one another. It wasn’t until she was in a relationship with a normal drinker that her drinking became very noticeable. She found herself trying to moderate around him, but says it backfired often.

Meg’s says that she had some cognitive dissonance growing because she knew that the alcohol was pulling her away from her authenticity but found herself drinking more to try and shut that voice down. The drinking escalated during COVID when Meg was working at home, drinking all day, and hiding bottles from her boyfriend. She soon lost her job and the next day her boyfriend broke up with her.

Meg moved from California, back into her mom’s home in Las Vegas. Meg and her mother hadn’t lived together for the last 10 years, so her mother wasn’t aware how much Meg drank. After a day of drinking and blacking out, Meg and her mother got into a big fight that led to her trashing her room. Meg woke up the next day feeling really low and scared of the person she was becoming when she drank.

The day after the blowout, Meg and her mother had a long discussion where Meg revealed more to her about how drunk she was and that she had a problem with drinking. Her mother told her, “I love you and I don’t like you right now”. Meg says that was very painful, but it opened her up to working on recovery.

Meg knew she couldn’t say “never” so instead focused on taking things day by day. She was in a great environment for healing and had plenty of time to take walks and she came up with an idea to treat it like an experiment. She set goals of not drinking through several upcoming events and leaned on friends and family to help hold her accountable.

After around 90 days, Meg recognized that she was doing ok by herself but knew she needed community and connection. She joined the Café RE community and started attending retreats, which have been life-changing for her.

Meg quickly saw some positive results when she quit drinking. Her career has kicked off, and she has been promoted every year since she started at Meow Wolf. Meg says she went from being a reactive person to a proactive person. Sobriety has given Meg tools to navigate the full range of emotions. Journalling and writing are important to Meg. She is currently documenting her journey through treatment for Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma on her blog Sincerely, Nutmeg.

Meg’s parting piece of guidance: make sober a priority, because you are worth it.

We love you, Meg. Looking forward to seeing you dance at Bozeman 2027! 😊

Recovery Elevator

You took the elevator down.

You’ve got to take the stairs back up.

We can do this.

RE 589: The Little Things

by Kris Oyen | Jun 1, 2026 | Podcast

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Today we have Brooke. She is 55 years old, lives in Denver, CO and she took her last drink on February 17^th, 2026.

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If you’re wondering what you can expect in your first seven days alcohol free, well, we just created a FREE 7-day guide for your first seven days.

[02:39] Thoughts from Paul:

In the upcoming book, This is How We Quit, we are currently narrowing down the submissions from 66 to around 20. While reviewing these all, Paul shares with us a snippet from one of them by Kristi, who was the guest on episode 492.

[07:45] Paul introduces Brooke:

Brookes lives in Denver, CO, has been married for 25 years and they have two sons. She has a background in education and for fun she enjoys being outside. They enjoy hiking, skiing, walking and playing tennis.

Growing up, Brooke believed that alcohol was necessary part of living. She saw her parents drink casually and was in a lot of environments where drinking was a given. Brooke took her first drink in high school, and it was just part of socializing throughout high school, college and her early professional years.

Brooke says it’s hard to imagine a time when she didn’t think drinking was normalized. Whether drinking for celebration or drinking for grieving, alcohol was always present.

Once Brooke reached her 40s, she noticed that it wasn’t as easy to get up the next day without some sort of hangover symptoms even if all she had was one or two drinks after a hard day at work.

Brooke was starting to question her drinking but the talk about alcohol being “good for us” was conflicting. She was beginning to see the signs of alcohol interfering with her health. She was participating in cleanses for 10 or 30 days and found that she felt so much better when she took breaks from drinking. It was hard for her to think about quitting completely because if how much it was present socially.

When Brooke’s mother was diagnosed with cancer, she noticed that all of the doctors discouraged alcohol. This got the wheels turning for Brooke and she did a deep dive on the detriments of alcohol on our bodies.

Brooke was recovering from shingles this past February and that is when she decided she was done with alcohol. She doesn’t feel like it was a rock bottom moment, but more of a realization that she was just exhausted from the inner dialogue around her drinking.

When she initially quit, Brooke was questioning how she was going to show up in her life without the drinking. She had experience quitting from doing cleanses in the past, so she knew it would be tough initially, but was prepared to be kind to herself throughout the process. She focused on caring for herself as she would care for one of her children if they were in distress or sick.

Learning and reading research about what alcohol does to our bodies has been helpful for Brooke. She has learned to slow down and be more aware of her feelings and what she needs to make herself feel better, without alcohol. Brooke uses a breathwork to help calm her nervous system and has also found great healing in nature.

In addition to yoga, mediation, breathwork and nature, other resources Brooke has found helpful on her journey are attending therapy, reading Quitlit, research on functional medicine and reading the bible. Attending meetings with sober communities has been important as well.

At about two months sober at the time of this recording, Brooke says she feels stronger than she’s ever felt. She feels free and clear in both her head and heart spaces and is excited to explore life free of alcohol.

Recovery Elevator

Go big. Because eventually we’ll all go home.

I love you guys.

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