by Paul Churchill | May 6, 2019 | Podcast
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Nick, with 111 days sober, shares his story.
On today’s episode Paul discusses anxiety, depression and stress. “These pains you feel are messengers. Listen to them.” ~ Rumi.
Depression is when mental energies are stuck in the past, anxiety is when we are living in the future, and stress accumulates when the end goal is more important than the task at hand. Liberation from all three of these dysfunctions resides in the present moment.
There is an undeniable connection between alcohol and depression. Remove alcohol and the bulk of melancholy should be lifted within a matter of months. Anxiety levels should also return to baseline after removing alcohol from your life. When we are primarily focused on the end outcome, and not the task at hand, we experience stress. Stress can be devastating to the equanimity in the body. The most powerful remedy to depression, anxiety, and stress is to ground yourself in the moment.
SHOW NOTES
[10:40] Paul introduces Nick
Nick is 32 years old and lives in Vancouver, Canada. He works in the career center at a university. He has been married for 2 years. For fun, he is still trying to figure that out in sobriety, but he enjoys having conversation and making connections with people.
[13:20] Give us a little background about your drinking.
Nick didn’t really start drinking until his early 20’s. He says he liked to drink, that there never really was a time that he did not enjoy it. He felt he could drink more than most and still be OK. And what that ended up doing was it basically normalized drinking large amounts of alcohol, because he wasn’t getting sick or waking up with a hangover. Things slowly escalated from there.
In 2010 Nick moved to Vancouver. There were a few times when he decided that he didn’t like how much he was drinking, and he would just stop for a few months at a time.
[17:00] What was the catalyst for you to decide to go a month or two without alcohol?
He went through a really messed up experience between his best friend and the person he was dating at the time. He dealt with that experience by drinking. What he came to realize was that alcohol just made him feel worse. So, he distanced himself from those 2 people and from alcohol. He went 3-4 months without drinking, not thinking he would never drink again, but more because he felt he needed a break from it.
When Nick started to drink again, the next year or two, it wasn’t that bad.
But what came back very quickly was the familiar feeling that alcohol made him feel comfortable, safe, more confident.
The thing that tipped Nick off to drinking becoming a problem was in order to feel normal or comfortable in a situation, he needed alcohol.
[20:15] When did you realize that your drinking was a problem?
It’s hard for him to pinpoint exactly when that happened. It built very slowly over time. It snowballed and it wasn’t until many years later that he realized that he had lost control.
[22:05] When was the moment that you did stop and see that alcohol was the factor that was causing that unease in your life?
Nick says there were lots of smaller moments, but when he really knew it, it was about 6 months after a good friend died from leukemia. He started isolating and drinking alone.
[25:50] Did you have a rock bottom moment? How did you finally make the push forward into sobriety?
Nick tried to moderate, which didn’t work. He then started to go to counseling on a regular basis. He was honest with his therapist about his drinking. He started journaling which helped him to see why he was drinking. He became more self-aware and was communicating better. He was still sad and grieving. Over the next year his drinking escalated.
Around September 2018 he was listening to a lot of podcasts and just knew that he had to give up drinking. He came home one day, after listening to the RE podcast, took his earbuds out, and just cried. Part of the reason he cried was because he realized that he was not alone.
[34:05] When the tears came flowing, what did it feel like to fully lean in?
Nick says it felt terrifying and he felt very vulnerable, but also so relieved. That began a long series of day ones. On December 1st he joined the Café’RE Facebook group. After drinking a lot after a staff party on December 7, he has not picked up since.
[41:30] What was the first week like, the first month? How did you do it?
The first few days were a little rough. Because of all the journaling he had done he knew the hours that he needed to keep himself busy. He changed the route he would take as he would walk home so that he would not be passing liquor stores. He got connected and reached out to others in the group.
[44:16] With 111 days what’s he biggest challenge you’ve encountered so far?
The feeling of plateauing. He’s sober and isn’t experiencing cravings, so the question of “what now”?
[45:50] What was the Recovery Elevator Nashville event like?
It was great. As soon as he heard about the Nashville event, he knew he had to try to get himself there.
[48:30] What are you going to do next in recovery?
Nick would like to work with people in addiction and recovery.
[51:20] Rapid Fire Round
- Worst memory from drinking?
Waking up and realizing that you hurt someone you care about, but you can’t remember why, is the absolute worst feeling in the world.
- Do you remember a specific ‘oh-shit’ moment?
The last night he drank. It was though the scotch he was drinking was water. It just wasn’t working anymore.
- Best advice you’ve ever received? And what advice can you give to someone who is thinking about getting sober?
Be open and vulnerable, be willing to give and receive love.
- You might be an alcoholic if…
You go to slide a wine bottle under your couch, and you hear it hit another bottle, which hits another bottle.
Upcoming retreats:
Bozeman Retreat – August 14-18, 2019
Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020
You can find more information about these events here
Resources mentioned in this episode:
This episode is brought to you in support by ZipRecruiter. Right now, my listeners can try ZipRecruiter for free. Visit Ziprecruiter.com/elevator
Connect with Cafe RE– Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free
Sobriety Tracker iTunes
Sobriety Tracker Android
Sober Selfies! – Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com
“Recovery Elevator – It all starts from the inside-out.”
by Paul Churchill | Apr 22, 2019 | Podcast
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James, with a sobriety date of November 12, 2016, shares his story.
Recovery Elevator is on Instagram! Please follow Paul and Ben here .
On today’s podcast Paul discuses relapse. For some, and Paul has only met a few, relapse isn’t part of their story. But for the vast majority it is, and it isn’t something to be ashamed of. Spontaneous sobriety is rare. Paul feels that the word ‘relapse’ is another word in recovery, similar to the word ‘alcoholic’, that needs to be thrown out. The word ‘relapse’ has implications of failure.
When we drink again, after having made the internal declaration not to, we are simply doing more field research, learning lessons along the way. If you find yourself in a continuous cycle of field research, self-compassion is key. Stop placing success and failure parameters on whether you drank last night or not. When we start addressing what we are using alcohol to cover up than relapse will become less frequent and even a thing of the past.
When you do find yourself on stable footing, beware of the 3 most dangerous words on this journey…I got this.
SHOW NOTES
**Listeners you can listen to James’ first interview back on episode 105 when he had 74 days of sobriety, today he has 850 days.
[8:05] Paul introduces James
James is 31 years old and lives in New Jersey with his wife and their pomsky, Milo. He works in Manhattan. For fun he likes to golf, go to the gym, and hang with his wife and pup.
[10:50] Give us a little background about your drinking.
James started drinking when he was 13, stealing beers and wine coolers from the liquor cabinet. In high school he was not a big drinker, although he remembers how drinking helped make him feel comfortable.
He started college, on a golf scholarship, became good friends with one of his teammates that was a Christian, started going to bible study and church and didn’t drink his entire freshman year. Later, one of his teammates from England, was graduating so they threw a party and James drank. He picked up right where he left off and the next three years of college he was binge drinking and dabbled in drugs.
The spring semester of his senior year his coach called him in to his office and told him not to come to practice anymore, that he was coming in smelling like liquor and bringing the rest of the team down. This was the first time that he realized his drinking was affecting other people.
[13:44] Can you tell us what it felt like to have someone on the outside call you out on your drinking.
Immediately James was embarrassed and ashamed. He walked out of the office feeling sad and like he had let everyone down. He was able to curb his drinking enough to not be a burden and make it through the last 3 months playing golf.
2010 James was in Barcelona, caddying at a nice country club, the 2nd day he caddied he met a man that offered him a job which he took a week later. This was the beginning of the end. From the time he graduated at 21 years old to 28 years old, when he got sober, it was a quick progression of drugs and alcohol. In the span of 5 years James lost his Grandfather, his uncle and his Dad. Instead of dealing with the losses he used alcohol and drugs.
At 27 he was arrested for possession of cocaine, theft, and disturbing the peace. This leads to an intervention by his family and his Mom gives him the option to go to rehab or see a therapist. He picked the therapist. He went through a number of therapists and his girlfriend of 2 years left him during this time.
[22:40] What did it feel like that moment when you told yourself you were done.
He immediately felt a sense of relief. He reached out to a friend from college, that he used to party with, but from his posts on Facebook knew that he had gotten sober. At this time neither his family, or his girlfriend, would talk to him. He went to see his friend from college the next day. Talking to him helped, and he also started 12 weeks of IOP. Everyday he would ask himself, is this going to honor my father. He knew he had to make some changes and he firmly believes his father died to save his life.
[24:45] Once you surrendered, how did you make it one week, one month, how did you do it?
One day at a time. James says he was never a half-in guy, so once he decided to get sober, he dove in. He found the RE podcast, started reading a lot, went to AA, and was going to IOP and therapy 3 times a week. Very early he burned the ships with everyone, which he says was very therapeutic. He could finally breath and no longer had all the guilt and the shame.
[28:00] What was the transition from drinking/partying like you did, to the clean and sober life, like?
James said it was hard, but that it was almost like he was going back to the person he was the whole time, and it was a relief. In the last 6 months he shifted from playing the victim and feels he is becoming exactly who he is supposed to be.
[33:05] Talk to us about your year 1 and year 2 and the differences between the two.
James says he definitely had the classic pink cloud and felt great. At the end of year 1 he started to struggle a bit but after he hit the year mark, he felt rejuvenated. He booked the trip to Peru with Café RE and between months 13-15 things took another turn. Things felt dark and he was asking himself if this was what he got sober for. It was then he had a conversation with a friend, and with Paul, about ayahuasca and stayed in Peru to attend a ceremony. James says it wasn’t a magic bullet but that ayahuasca, hiking Machu Picchu, and getting married in October, is what changed his attitude about everything.
[35:15] On a group chat we were on you said one of the lessons you learned was that you no longer have to be the biggest guy in the room, talk to us about that.
The first night, of the first ceremony he did, there was a gentleman there from New Zealand who was bigger than James. (Who is 6’3” and 220 pounds, which he had always identified himself by.) During the ceremony James was weeping and this gentleman came up behind him, put his arms around him, held him like a baby, and told him to just let it all out. It was at this time he let go of feeling like always had to me the biggest guy in the room. He was supposed to do 3 ceremonies but after the first one he told the shaman that he had gotten what he needed and didn’t do the remaining 2.
[39:30] Talk to us about Cardamone Coaching.
Even as a kid James knew he wanted to help people. Wanting to become a recovery coach was something he discussed with Paul while in Peru. He realized fear was what was holding him back and that that was all bullshit, so he got certified to be a recovery coach. His goal is to help people in recovery by using his own experience.
James’ coaching website is: https://www.cardamonecoaching.com/ .
[45:06] I saw your registration come in for the Bozeman retreat, what are you looking forward to at this retreat?
Going back to Bozeman, it’s a change of pace from New York City. Seeing some of the same people and meeting new people. The retreats have changed James’ life.
[47:25] Rapid Fire Round
- What is you plan in sobriety moving forward?
Continue doing what I’m doing, stay the course, one day at a time, and helping people.
- What’s your favorite resource in sobriety?
Reading, I must have read 35 books in the last 2 ½ years, reading has really opened me up to different things.
- In regards to sobriety what’s the best advice you’ve ever received?
It gets better and you never have to feel this way again if you don’t pick up a drink or a drug.
- What parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?
You are good enough
.
- You might be an alcoholic if…
If you get arrested outside of a nightclub with drugs in your pocket, a stolen credit card and no shoes on.
You can sign up for a FREE 5-day Recovery Elevator video course here.
Upcoming retreats:
Bozeman Retreat – August 14-18, 2019
Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020
You can find more information about these events here
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Babbel
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Green Chef
Connect with Cafe RE– Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free
Sobriety Tracker iTunes
Sobriety Tracker Android
Sober Selfies! – Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com
“Recovery Elevator – It all starts from the inside-out.”
by Paul Churchill | Apr 8, 2019 | Podcast
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Libby, with 112 days of sobriety, shares her story.
Paul talks about a trend he noticed in the airport bookstore. Amongst the ’20 best sellers’ there were several books with clear, unambiguous titles. Our society is collectively starting to wake up and are looking for ways to unf*ck ourselves. He says that all of these books, including the one he is currently writing, are not fulfilling a trend or a niche, but that it’s a movement.
https://newrepublic.com/article/153153/age-anxiety
Paul recently read an article titled the Age of Anxiety in the New Republic,
According to studies by the National Institute of Mental Health, nearly 20 percent of Americans experience an anxiety disorder in a given year; over 30 percent experience an anxiety disorder over the course of their lifetimes. And the rate is rising: The American Psychiatric Association, in a May study drawing from a survey of 1,000 American adults, diagnosed a statistically significant increase in national anxiety since 2017.
But listeners listen closely, there is nothing fundamentally wrong with you. Never has been, never will be. This anxiety is a good thing. This collective state of unrest will eventually show us the way.
This jittery national mood has given rise to what Rebecca Jennings at Vox has dubbed “anxiety consumerism”—the rise of a plethora of products, from fidget spinners to essential-oil sprays, to weighted blankets. Perhaps the most well-known product to fall into this anxiety consumerism category is alcohol.
Those who struggle with addiction are the trailblazers in the collective unf*ck yourself movement. Not just for those who grapple with addiction to alcohol, but for everyone.
SHOW NOTES
[7:15] Libby how long have you been sober?
She has been sober since October 23, 2018, giving her 112 days of sobriety.
[7:40] In these last 112 days what is the biggest challenge you’ve encountered?
She says that the cravings and the obsession to drink in the first couple months was definitely the toughest time.
[9:00] Paul Introduces Libby.
Libby is 32 years old and lives in Louisville, Kentucky. She is an interior designer and is currently waiting tables at night. She has been married for 5 years, has no kids, has a dog named Boomerang, and a cat named Brice. For fun she works out, does crafts, is decorating her house, and enjoys hiking when the weather is nice.
[11:05] Give us a little background about your drinking.
Libby had her first drink at 15 and throughout high school she drank on the weekends. By early 20s she was drinking daily, but still highly functional, holding two jobs. She was coasting by until 2017 when she got fired from a job. Libby says this is when her drinking ‘got wheels’.
[12:30] What led you to seeking out alcohol to alleviate the pain?
She was fired suddenly, in a hateful way, and she had never gone through anything like that. She was devastated and started drinking all day. After a couple of weeks, she was experiencing morning tremors, or shakes, which she had never experienced before. By the end of 2017 she was drinking in the mornings just to function. During this time, she tried out AA a couple times and decided she just wasn’t ready.
[14:50] What was it like when you went to the AA meeting?
Before going into her first AA meeting Libby had the shakes so bad that she had to have a shot of alcohol. She didn’t really have any intention to stop drinking, she just wanted control over it. She wanted to stop drinking during the day and get control of her life again and just be a functional drinker. Fast forward to 2018 and she had managed to cut back on her drinking, only drinking at night. That lasted a couple months. In April 2018 she found herself drunk at work and went home and told her husband that she needed to get into a treatment program, that drinking had taken control again.
The next day, after drinking, she tried to get into an inpatient treatment program. The first place turned her away because they didn’t take her insurance, the second place allowed her to stay for 3 days for ‘medical detox’ and then released her due to her insurance as well. After being dry for 3 days she thought she had things under control, but she picked up right where she left off.
[21:40] Take us through the next steps in your journey.
Not having a day job Libby was able to drink all day. After about 2 weeks her husband, tired of coming home and finding her drunk on the couch, packed his bags and left. He called her best friend and told her that Libby was in trouble, but that he didn’t know how to help her. Her best friend made some phone calls and found a free center, The Healing Place, that would take Libby. She stayed there for 4 days while she detoxed and went home. Back at home she stayed sober for 11 days and then again was right back to where she left off. After showing up at work drunk and hitting what Libby calls her first bottom, she went back to The Healing Place and stayed for 30 days.
[26:35] Take us from when you got out after your 30 days up to your sobriety date.
After about 74 days of sobriety, meeting with her sponsor and going to 3 AA meetings a day Libby found herself at the liquor store buying a bottle without giving it any thought. Looking at this as a ‘slip’ she got right back on the wagon and back to her meetings. Sober for another 46 days she then relapsed, drinking for 6 days straight. This was her 2nd bottom, this binder ended on October 22, 2018 and she has been sober ever since.
[28:40] How do you look at those ‘relapses’?
As lessons, she learned that they start in her head first. Now when her thoughts start going in that direction, she recognizes it and has a new method to deal with it.
[33:15] Why do you think you drank?
She said that in the beginning it was just because she enjoyed it. During her 20s she had a lot of trauma and it helped her feel better. Drinking became a habit, then she physically depended on it.
[34:40] Paul and Libby discuss what steps she can take to protect her sobriety while her husband continues to drink.
[40:55] I’ve seen where sobriety thing is contagious, what are your thoughts on that?
Libby agrees, attraction rather than promotion.
[42:50] What have you learned about yourself in this journey?
She has learned she is a lot stronger than she thought she was.
[43:30] Rapid Fire Round
- What was your absolute worst memory from drinking?
Libby describes her last couple days of drinking.
- What is your plan in sobriety moving forward?
I am going to continue working the AA program and working with my sponsor and I want to eventually help other people stay sober.
- In regards to sobriety what’s the best advice you’ve ever received?
Don’t believe the lies.
- What parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?
Give AA a shot.
- You might be an alcoholic if…
You drink mouthwash in the morning to try and get rid of the shakes before work.
A pint of beer takes 15 minutes off your life
https://www.ksbw.com/article/wine-beer-early-death-extra-glass/26532630
For someone in their 40’s every glass of alcohol above the suggested weekly threshold of 5 shortens their life by 15 minutes. Alcohol is shit.
Upcoming retreats:
Bozeman Retreat – August 14-18, 2019
Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020
You can find more information about these events here
Resources mentioned in this episode:
This episode is brought to you in support by Robinhood. Right now, Robinhood is giving my listeners free stock such as Apple, Ford or Sprint to help build your portfolio. Signup at elevator.robinhood.com
Connect with Cafe RE– Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free
Sobriety Tracker iTunes
Sobriety Tracker Android
Sober Selfies! – Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com
“Recovery Elevator – It all starts from the inside-out.”
by Paul Churchill | Feb 25, 2019 | Podcast
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Subscribe to the Recovery Elevator Podcast Apple Podcasts | | More
Juan, with a sobriety date of May 29, 2018, shares his story.
Congratulations to Kirk S. in Florida for hitting 1 year of sobriety.
This Friday, March 1st, registration for the Recovery Elevator Retreat in Bozeman goes live. Space is limited for this retreat. You can find more information about events here
After the interview with Juan, Paul will discuss detoxing from alcohol and how dangerous it can be.
Paul talks about cravings. What they are, what they represent, and what to do when we experience them. Also, are all cravings the same? In simple form, a craving is a desire to regulate our inner state with an external substance or behavior.
SHOW NOTES
[9:25] Paul Introduces Bill.
Juan, with a sobriety date of May 29, 2018, is 32 years old and is from Los Angeles, CA. He is a personal assistant, and single. For fun Juan likes to play music (he is in a band), go to the movies, hike, workout.
[10:25] Give us a little background about your drinking.
Juan started drinking at the age of 19 to ‘fit in’. He had recently come out as a gay man and drinking helped him feel more confident and comfortable in his own skin. Touring with his band all over the country and world, drinking was the way he got rid of his performance anxiety. Around age 25 things started to get messy. Towards the end of his drinking his anxiety was through the roof.
[13:25] Tell us more about your anxiety.
At first drinking would calm his anxiety, but once he ‘went over the threshold’ he would start to get paranoid. The worst part was the fear he would have when waking up in the morning. His self-esteem was at an all time low. In May of 2017 Juan hit this internal rock bottom, got into a horrible physical altercation with a friend and knew something had to change.
[18:35] Walk us through what happened after May 27, 2107.
He went through a ‘dry drunk’ stage. He just stopped drinking, started avoiding going out, avoiding certain people and situations. It wasn’t easy and he was not feeling the benefits right away. He felt like he was on a diet and depriving himself. He did this for about 4 months and then felt like his relationship with alcohol had changed, and he decided to drink again. By his birthday in February his drinking was back to where it was when he quit.
[22:15] Continue from where you are back to drinking and your anxiety is back.
On May 28, 2018 he decided to try sobriety again. This time he would do it differently. He started to read books and watch movies about alcoholism. After about a month and a half, and at a friend’s suggestion, he went to his first AA meeting. Although he was nervous and uncomfortable, he immediately felt like he found what he needed. He got a sponsor and attends about 4 meetings a week.
[25:20] Tell us about your first AA meeting.
His first meeting was very small and intimate. It was a lot to take in and he left thinking he would go back, but still feeling confused. He continued going once a week for a while, ducking in and out, until it felt more comfortable.
[26:40] What advice do have for someone that is saying there is no way they could go to AA?
If you are open and ready AA can work for you.
[29:10] Walk us through a typical day in your recovery.
Juan wakes up earlier, prays, makes a gratitude list, goes to work, 4 evenings a week he catches an AA meeting. Everyday in sobriety is different but he tries to something of service for someone every day. He always tries to keep connection with someone throughout the day.
[31:40] What has been the biggest hurdle you have had to overcome in the past 7 ½ months?
It has been in just that last few weeks, he is transitioning out of his job that he has had the 9 years. It’s the first time in 9 years he is unsure about where he will be working. Although it is a scary time for Juan, he feels a lot calmer than he thought he would and is taking it one day at a time. He doesn’t think he would’ve been able to handle this situation before sobriety.
[35:05] What was harder, coming out of the closet as a gay man, or coming out of the closet as an alcoholic?
Definitely coming out of the closet as an alcoholic.
[37:15] What is it like playing music and being on stage in sobriety?
At first it was difficult because of stage fright. But now being nervous and being in the moment is a good thing.
[40:08] What have you learned about yourself in this journey?
He is more confident and enjoys people more.
[41:15] Rapid Fire Round
- What is your favorite guitar rift to play?
The intro rift in Smashing Pumpkin’s – Today
- What was your worst memory from drinking?
The fight he got into with his friend.
- Did you have an ‘oh-shit’ moment?
Coming home with friends in an Uber and feeling so alone and desperate.
- What is your plane moving forward?
Continuing with his step work, finding new sober friends and hopefully finding a whole new career.
- What is your favorite resource in recovery?
AA is the go-to for me.
- Regarding sobriety, what is the best advice you have ever received?
Letting go of control.
- What parting piece of advice can you give to listeners?
Contrary action, doing what you don’t want to do.
- You might be an alcoholic if…
Your bandmates on tour lock you in a basement because you are that out of control and everyone is scared of you.
Upcoming retreats:
Bozeman Retreat – August 14-18, 2019
Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020
You can find more information about these events here
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Connect with Cafe RE– Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free
Sobriety Tracker iTunes
Sobriety Tracker Android
Sober Selfies! – Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com
“Recovery Elevator – It all starts from the inside.”
by Paul Churchill | Dec 5, 2018 | Blog, Expectations
I’ve been wanting to write this post for quite some time, and I’m excited to have finally done so. A cure to addiction… Is this even possible? Before we explore this, let’s take a snapshot of what addiction is right now. At this moment in time, 2018, I feel we are at the beginning of what our understanding of what addiction even is, let alone finding a treatment for it. Are we close to a cure at this moment? Unfortunately, I don’t think so, in fact, I don’t believe we are even close. With 83 years passing since the inception of AA in 1935, we still don’t know much about what causes addiction and how to treat it; especially modern science. In 2014, there were 143 med schools in the USA, and only 14 of them had 1 class on addiction even though it’s estimated that 40% of hospital beds are occupied due to alcohol-related issues. This is staggering. It can be said that rehab is a 30+ thousand-dollar introduction to 12 step programs, and the best study that I can find is that AA has a 7-8% success rate according to the Sober Truth by Lance Dodes. Currently, 85% of rehab facilities are 12 step based. Studies show that 2.5 people out of 1000 make it to 2 years of sobriety. Yikes, but the good news is you can continuously start over. Governments have no idea how to deal with addiction. The 40 years, 1 trillion-dollar war on drugs has primarily been a waste. There are still 21 million Americans, 80% of those with alcohol use disorders, who need treatment with addiction. Estimates show that of these 21 million Americans, only 10% of those get the actual help they need. I don’t want to paint a grim picture for readers, but currently, on this planet, we aren’t doing so hot when it comes to treating addiction. In fact, we’re failing, but it’s a start.
Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob created a fantastic program called Alcoholics Anonymous that currently has over 2 million members in over 120,000 groups worldwide. There is Smart Recovery, Refuge Recovery, yoga, meditation, Recovery Elevator and more. People are trying their hardest to tackle this planet’s most pressing epidemic; addiction. Despite the bleak snapshot painted above, I feel we are on the right track. I think in 500 years when we look back, we will all be looked at as pioneers for what shaped the way for recovery treatment. Or what we’re doing now may be like bloodletting. Doctors thought for around 800 years that bloodletting was the best way to rid the body of an infectious disease. Turns out, human beings need blood. I don’t think this is the case with how we are currently treating addiction, but you never know.
Let’s discuss what I mean when I say cure to addiction. What I’m proposing should render addiction obsolete. As in it won’t happen, or least not nearly at the level of occurrence that we see today. I guess this wouldn’t really be a cure, because to have a cure, you would need a disease, and what I’ll be covering should essentially create an environment that doesn’t foster the disease. Too much of western medicine emphasizes treating existing illnesses since there isn’t much money to be made in getting at the source. When I say cure to addiction, I don’t mean addiction happens, then insert treatment. I’m saying, addiction doesn’t happen in the first place. This is the more ideal scenario. I’d be more than happy to be out of a job.
Keep in mind, this is all speculative, some of these ideas may seem so far out, so bizarre that it isn’t even a possibility… But if you give it some thought, this may make sense. Some of you will agree with this, some of you might not want what I’m proposing ever to happen. In fact, it scares me too. It’s uncomfortable. Who knows, if MP3’s are still a thing in 500 years, I may get this spot on, or I may have wildly missed the mark.
Where did I get the idea for this post? For the cure to addiction? Well, it was at my fantasy football draft in Las Vegas this past August. We were having dinner at the Hofbrauhaus House, and I was watching my two buddies argue about the dividing topic of immigration. One of them is a liberal, and the other is a conservative. They’ve had this same conversation or a similar one, the past 5 drafts. I knew I wouldn’t be engaging in this conversation, so I decided just to sit, listen and observe. As they were defending their steadfast positions with eloquent and non-eloquent diatribes based on part fact but mostly conviction, a strange thought arrived. It said the only way to solve the immigration issue is to eliminate all borders. Across the whole planet. And before we go any further, I want to mention, this post is about addiction, not immigration or politics, so please do your best to listen with an open mind. I said to myself, no, that can’t be right. That will never happen. And then the wheels in mind started moving. So much so, that I had to step outside the restaurant and sit on a bench for about 10 minutes. My brain kept connecting the dots until I said, holy shit. That’s the cure to addiction. Yippee!!
You might be saying to yourself episode 199 ended with you thanking planet earth, now you’re talking about a world with no borders. Wow, Paul, I bet you’re wearing Birkenstocks and have distanced yourself from all forms of plastic. Nope, I’m a guy who lives in Montana, a red state, who shoots clays with my shotgun for fun on the weekend, but deep down, even though some of it doesn’t sit well with me either, it feels right.
Okay, let’s explore this. In my opinion, the most profound line in “The Realm of Hungry Ghosts” by Dr. Gabor Mate, is that anthropologists have no record of addiction in pre-modern times. Contrary to popular belief, Europeans did not bring alcohol to the Native American, Inuit, and Aboriginal populations, or to South America to the Mayans, Incas or Aztecs. Alcohol has been around for 1,000’s of years and records show that all these cultures consumed alcohol. So why is that only within the past 400-500 years has abuse of alcohol and addiction been a problem. Why has is the swath of addiction caused more havoc within some social groups more than others? Before we discuss this, let’s look at the Rat Park experiment conducted by Bruce Alexander.
I first came across this study in my first year of podcasting, and I’m reluctant to say, I dismissed it. At that time, I was in the camp that addiction is roughly 80% genetics and about 20% environmental, now, I’ve done somewhat of 180. I feel that addiction is about 20% genetics and 80% environmental. Okay, back to Rat Park. The study looks at two different environments for rats. In one cage, it had a single rat. The rat has access to food, water, and cocaine. It was only a matter of time before the lone rat chose a diet of strict cocaine and ended up dying. This process was repeated continuously with the same result. You might say, duh, cocaine is one of the top 4 most addictive drugs on the planet. But what happens when the environment changes. The second environment is called Rat Park which is full of rat families, with toys for the rats to play with, with mates for the rats, and probably Third Eye Blind Playing in the background. In Rat Park, the rats have access to food, water, and an unlimited supply of cocaine. What happened? Nothing. Cocaine/addiction was no longer a problem. Eliminate stress, change the environment, and eliminate addiction. It worked for rats, it should for us right? Well not so simple, but in theory, yes, and it’s gonna take some time. Johan Hari talks about this in his Ted Talk titled, “The Opposite of Addiction is Connection.” I highly recommend watching this. He continues to say the opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety. It’s connection. I would say it’s more of a combo of sobriety and connection.
I am also reluctant to say when I first saw Johan Hari’s Ted Talk 3 years ago, I dismissed it and wasn’t a big fan. Now, I think I think, for the most part, it’s spot on. Johan’s Ted talk is starting to echo a theme that has been presenting itself the more I learn about alcoholism and addiction. That addiction is not about the pleasurable effects of substances, it’s about the user’s inability to connect in healthy ways with other human beings. In other words, addiction is not a substance disorder, it’s a social disorder. Previously, when I first started the Recovery Elevator podcast, early 2015, I was in the camp that the pleasurable effects of alcohol, and drugs, were the primary drivers for addiction but now I feel that the pleasurable effects of alcohol and drugs help soothe inner trauma and our inabilities to connect healthily with other humans. On an individual level, we are not at fault for this. In today’s breakneck fast-paced world, we are living further and further away from other human beings, we falsely connect more and more via social media and our society has a significant problem with accumulating external possessions because we’re taught this is healthy. Unfortunately, much of today’s economy is reliant upon our addictions.
I feel the birth of addiction occurred with the mass displacement of people from their lands, communities, and roots that started with the substantial land grabs of the Spanish, French, Dutch, English, and Americans on our own continent. Some groups of people, who are disproportionately affected by addiction, got the raw end of the stick, and they are still paying the price. What about those who weren’t displaced from their lands, maybe someone like myself and probably several other listeners. Well, life has drastically changed for everyone on the face of the planet in the past 500 years, Especially in the previous 100, and even more so in the past 50. Before the first flight took place in 1902, it was a lot harder to leave a community. Today, I think a lot of us are still trying to figure out “where we belong” and this sense of alienation has affected some more than others. For myself, this has resulted in addiction.
Back to the absence of addiction in pre-modern times. You might be saying to yourself, Paul, I’m relatively certain borders, boundaries, tribe lines, restrictions, precincts, confines, rivers existed in pre-modern times… Yes, this is correct. But when civilizations remained settled for upwards of 500-1,000+ years, and you were lucky to have oxen and wagon, you may have never encountered a border or really knew what one was in your lifetime. If everything you needed was already in your own “rat park,” then why leave?
Now let’s explore a futuristic world without borders. Again, this scares me. Big time, but if you think about it, it’s really the only way things can go. We’ve been doing the conquer, defeat, divide, overthrow, coup, rebellion, revolution, wage war, WWI, WWII, with sticks and clubs and now with nuclear bombs. For ages. It’s not working, and human beings are starting to wizen up. The EU opened its borders up in 1985, and this has made things easier.
When will this no border fantasy world occur? I don’t know, it might not. Artificial Intelligence might have something to say about it first. With the proliferation of social media, which isn’t a genuine human connection, things may get a lot worse before they get better. But barring nuclear war, ending everything for everyone, I think this will happen in the next 300-500 years. If you’re saying to yourself, I don’t want to live next to a white person, or I don’t want to live next to a black person, well, in the next 200 years, we’re all going to be the same color anyways so please get over yourself. I think, when everyone can move about this planet freely, when we can accept all human beings as equal when we are able to establish roots and communities wherever we’d like, then I think we’ll wake up one day and see the problem of addiction slowly fade away.
