Today we have Chris. He is 55 years old, from Madison, WI, and he took his last drink of alcohol on April 7th, 2015.

 

This episode is brought to you by:

 

Sign up and get 10% off: Better Help

Café RETHE social app for sober people

Bozeman 2026 – August 12th-16th, 2026

 

[02:02] Thoughts from Paul:

 

Paul recently gave an opening talk at a fundraising gala for Yellowstone Alliance Adventures. This is the venue where the annual Bozeman retreat is held. He shared with the guests that he holds an annual sober retreat there but initially hadn’t rehearsed sharing that he was also sober. After a few moments of silence, mid-talk, Paul shared that he is also in recovery.

 

Paul says he knows he didn’t have to share that part, but when he did, it felt good to be up there in front of a crowd as his authentic self. In a world that can very fake and shallow, people are craving authenticity. Paul wants to go places where he can be himself.

 

Listeners, where can you show up as yourself in your life? What curtains, walls, or barriers are you hiding behind where you think people don’t want to see you? While it isn’t easy to show up as your authentic self, you will be rewarded by doing so.

 

We are here; we are whole.

 

[07:03] Paul introduces Chris:

 

Chris is 55 years old, works in IT by day, has three kids across two marriages and for fun he likes to make music, create games, and enjoys working on art.

 

Chris’ parents divorced when he was young due to his father’s drinking. Because there was so much going on at home, Chris says he focused much of his attention on school, sports, drama and choir to remain out of the house. He shares that he only drank one time in high school and got caught and ended up with some consequences.

 

Once in college, Chris had the freedom to drinking and other drugs pretty heavily right away. Early on, he got kicked out of a bar. During is freshman year, depression kicked in and he had a suicide attempt. Chris says drinking was never good for him. He never felt like it was solving any problems, but he was entranced by it.

 

Chris never really saw his drinking as a problem and surrounded himself by people that drank like he did. He enjoyed playing in bands and going to bars. Over the next 15 years he began to get away from the drugs but found his alcohol use increasing to compensate. By his mid-30’s, Chris says it was just him in his basement pretending to record music or write a book, but the reality was it was just him down there drinking.

 

At this point in time, Chris knew he had to try and control his drinking but was unable to do so. His second marriage was to someone who drank more than he did, which he assumed meant she wouldn’t hassle him about what he was doing.

 

Chris says there wasn’t a definitive moment that led him to quit, it was more a gradual decent. He lost his job because he wasn’t very present, he got a DUI and then got a divorce, all within six months’ time. He had court ordered sobriety and white knuckled it for a while but ultimately planned his relapse which led to him drinking all hours of the day and realizing alcohol wasn’t working anymore.

 

Chris reflects that this realization was a good thing. He tried a lot of different things in the beginning: AA, SMART recovery, podcasts, Quitlit – anything to fill the void he initially felt by not drinking. He was always willing to try different things and acknowledges that some things come and go. He joined Café RE for a songwriting course as he was approaching 10 years sober. Chris knows that staying strong in his recovery daily is what will keep him from relapsing.

 

Chris is grateful for his sobriety as he has navigated some difficult things over the last several years. He is glad he no longer uses alcohol as a crutch to make it through life. When times are tough, he leans more into more meetings or talking to friends.

 

Recovery Elevator

You took the elevator down

You got to take the stairs back up

We can do this

I love you guys

 

RE Instagram

Sobriety Tracker iTunes 

RE YouTube