Episode 380– What is Sober?
Recovery Elevator is sponsored by BetterHelp.
Today we have Shrene. She is 46, from Arizona, and took her last drink on September 10, 2019
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Highlights from Paul
Paul talks about the word sober. For this podcast, sober refers to alcohol, because alcohol is what got Paul behind the microphone to launch Recovery Elevator. Paul suggests not getting too attached to any idea of what sober looks like. It’s not about the substance, but the freedom you have from the substance. Try not to judge others for their definition of sober, because it’s rarely black and white. When you judge others, you judge yourself and create separation. Defining sobriety can be a fool’s errand.
Sobriety is living authentically. Sobriety is not being a slave, to a substance, behavior, or action. Sobriety is living your life how you want to live, living with a connected head and heart, recognizing beauty, art, sunsets, a different vibration.
Sobriety is hope, taking off the chains, meeting yourself, a manageable life.
Sobriety is “downgrading additions.” Sarah Hepola – Blackout https://www.amazon.com/Blackout-Remembering-Things-Drank-Forget/dp/1455554588
If you remove alcohol and aren’t ready to say goodbye to everything else, go slow, take your time, and listen to your body. There is no right or wrong way to do this, and there is no generally accepted definition of sobriety.
At Recovery Elevator, we accept all versions of sober. We accept all versions of you.
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[12:04] Shrrene is married with two children, two dogs and is a lunch lady who makes lunch for 700 kids daily.
Shrrene remembers drinking as early as age three to four. She drank through her high school years. She stopped drinking when she got married at age 16 and she stopped drinking until after her son was born at age 26. She was a casual drinker.
At 40, she started drinking daily. She would sneak her drinking, hide bottles, and hide in her closet to drink. She quit during her pregnancy. She had open heart surgery at 39, then had a stroke. At age 41 she had a second open heart surgery but continued to drink. Her husband brought an AA Big Book home from an Al-Anon meeting. Her husband joined Celebrate Recovery and she joined him for meetings. She began to moderate but went back to field research regularly until 2019. Shrrene got sick and tired of being sick and tired. Prayer was instrumental for getting the desire to drink lifted. Now she doesn’t have a desire to drink, other than the fleeting thought and she plans to stay active in recovery and help others.
Shrrene slowly started talking to her husband, in AA meetings, journaling and learning to share. Journaling helped when she was too afraid to talk to others and it is a tool that still serves her today.
Attending AA and CR meetings were helpful, but Shrrene was reluctant to share. When she learned to open up, she felt less alone. She found the similarities in the stories of others. She encourages listeners to keep trying and never give up.
Odette reminds us “we can do hard things”. We can’t do hard things and be hard on ourselves. Chose yourself, chose kindness and be your own cheerleader.
Remember that you are not alone and together is always better.
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