Burn The Ships
For many people, the answer of what is it that is holding us back in our lives isn’t exactly obvious. The question of what is blocking us from obtaining that inner peace we deserve can be difficult to answer for some. The good news is that if you’re listening to this podcast, the answer is most likely alcohol is what’s holding you back any it may be time to “burn the ships”.
Fran with 16 months since his last drink, shares her story…
[8:00] Paul Introduces Fran.
Fran is 43 years old from Indiana, but originally from Cleveland. She’s married and a mother of 2. She’s a program director and massage therapist. She is an entrepreneur and loves yoga and the outdoors. She also likes to work in her yard. She previously had 3 years of sobriety during her 20’s.
[11:15] What made you seek out a sober life initially?
She injured herself as an athlete and then got into the restaurant business. Initially it was fun, but then she began drinking on the job. She realized her life was empty and she became depressed again. An ex of hers helped take her to a 12 step meeting. It worked until she stopped actively working on her sobriety.
[14:14] What was your initial attempt at sobriety like?
She was able to ground herself in who she was, with a clear mind at a very pivotal time in her development. She met other women in recovery and it felt a bit like a clique. She didn’t feel like she fit in. After graduating college sober, she started doing some internet dating. She met her husband and relocated to Indiana. She had her first child, then started drinking shortly after the child was born. She felt dislocated. She transitioned back into semi-regular drinking, which eventually lead to excess.
[20:02] Did you experience a bottom moment?
She had many. She would fight with her husband. She blacked out at a baby shower. She fought with her family and her husband’s family.
[26:37] What was it like when you first quit drinking?
It wasn’t easy. It was a process that took time. Initially motivated by weight loss, she felt like she was talking about it all the time. She realized that she could not go a day without drinking. Her husband was suffering from throat cancer and she started taking his pot pills after he recovered. She tried to substitute them for alcohol. She thought pot could get her sober.
[28:49] Did that help?
No. The anxiety and depression was worse. She became suicidal. She went back into recovery. She started listening to Recovery Elevator. She hit the gym. She found herself back at AA. She’s more committed this time, and this time it’s “no matter what”.
[33:26] What is your recovery portfolio like today?
She focuses on gratitude. She reads and meditates. She does yoga before work. She realized that other people around her now have permission to focus on their health, as she leads by example. Her marriage has improved a lot.
[37:06] What is it like to be a healer and to help people release tension and bad energy?
It’s a gift. When she’s able to be present, it helps them let go. As a sober person, she now honors and respects her own body and leads her clients and students to the same.
[38:54] Rapid Fire Round
- What was your worst memory from drinking?Seeing the despair on her child’s face and she witnessed her mother being drunk.
- Did you ever have an “oh-shit” moment?Stopping to buy alcohol on the way home from the gym, and opening the bottles before she got home.
- What’s your plan moving forward?
- What’s your favorite resource in recovery?Her sponsor.
- What’s the best advice you’ve ever received (on sobriety)?It’s going to get better if we stay away from alcohol.
- What parting piece of guidance can you give listeners who are in recovery or thinking about quitting drinking?It’s okay. It’s okay to give it a shot to see what it’s like. It’s not as scary as it seems.
- You might be an alcoholic if…“You’re so incapacitated by alcohol that your family thinks calling your reverend is the only way to get you to go home.”
Resources mentioned in this episode:
This episode is brought to you by Simple Contacts. Visit www.simplecontacts.com/elevator and use the promo code elevator for $30 off your first order.
The Language of Letting Go – a book by Melody Beattie
Connect with Cafe RE– Use the promo code Elevator for your first month free
Sober Selfies! – Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to firstname.lastname@example.org
“We took the elevator down, we gotta take the stairs back up, we can do this!”